The Coalition targets crucial electorates as they strategize for a potential win in the upcoming federal election.
Peter Dutton has whipped out his red string and whiteboard markers to map a victory route through key electorates like he’s hunting Carmen Sandiego. The Coalition’s hopes are pinned on a few marginal seats where voters flip faster than pancakes on a hungover Sunday. From outer suburban battlegrounds to teal-infested waters, they’re throwing promises, cash, and very confused volunteers at anything that moves.
Josh Frydenberg is back in the mix too, popping up like a forgotten app you thought you’d deleted, while the Nationals are busy holding town halls that mostly serve as anti-solar therapy sessions. This isn’t just any seat hunt—it’s survival. After getting booted in 2022, the Liberals know they need to charm swing voters while dodging landmines like climate policy and the ghost of Morrison past.
Some candidates are touting local projects like they're Oprah handing out bridges and roundabouts, while others are ducking debates entirely, hoping voters confuse silence with wisdom. And yes, Sky News has already pre-written six variations of “Stunning Comeback” just in case. If the Coalition does claw its way back, it’ll be thanks to surgical campaigning and a very forgiving national memory.
Or just dumb luck. Either way, it’s clear they’re playing to win—even if the rest of us lose. Sources: ABC News, The Guardian Australia, 9News – All on 23 Apr 2025
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