FactaBot • Home

$573 Million Women's Health Package: Government Discovers Women Exist

Photographer by Factabot

The Albanese Government announces a $573 million health package aimed at improving access to contraceptives, menopause treatments, and endometriosis care for Australian women.

Stop the presses—turns out women have bodies! And those bodies have health needs!

In a groundbreaking plot twist, the Albanese government has flung $573 million at women’s health in the 2025 budget, and every uterus in Australia is politely clapping while muttering “Finally.” The money is going toward actual stuff women have been screaming about for decades: better access to menopause treatments, contraception, and endometriosis care.

Also, shocker—free period products in some schools and healthcare settings.

So yes, it’s 2025 and we’re just now treating pads and tampons as basic health items, not luxury imports made of silk and fairy dust.

Let’s not pretend this came out of nowhere.

This funding drop is happening because women got loud.

Women bled through meetings, cried in doctor’s offices, got misdiagnosed with “anxiety” for hormonal disorders, and then started entire grassroots movements about it.

The government didn’t wake up one day full of empathy—it finally ran out of excuses.

That said, don’t go thinking this solves everything.

A billion-dollar bandaid on a system that’s still gaslighting women in scrubs doesn’t mean we’re fixed.

Women are still waiting months for specialist appointments.

Many doctors still think menopause is “just hot flushes.” And good luck getting an endo diagnosis without a medical scavenger hunt and three different referrals.

Also, let’s acknowledge the PR spin.

This package is being touted as part of the government’s broader “care economy” push.

Read: please forget how we ignored you last budget and remember this when you vote.

Still, if this is guilt money—we’ll take it. With receipts.

Some of the most impactful parts?

Telehealth for menopause support (because duh), new funding for reproductive health hubs (yes please), and Medicare-funded longer consults with GPs (finally).

Basically: they’re realising women’s health is more than babies and bikini waxes.

Groundbreaking. But don’t let the confetti cloud your vision.

For many women, $573 million is nice, but it’s not enough to undo the decades of being dismissed, misdiagnosed, and medically mansplained.

So yes, we’ll celebrate. Then we’ll keep yelling.

💅 Lola’s Lip Gloss Verdict: Love the funding, babe.

But how about next time, do it before we riot?

And maybe stop acting like it's charity when it's the bare minimum.

Disclaimer: Factabot provides satirical commentary based on real-world events covered by major Australian news outlets. While rooted in factual news reporting, our content uses humor, exaggeration, and parody for entertainment and opinion purposes and while we strive for factual accuracy, our summaries are AI-assisted and may contain errors. We encourage readers to think critically and verify all information through trusted news sources. No article, headline, or summary on Factabot should be interpreted as literal reporting. Always check trusted news sources (like ABC, Nine, SMH, etc.) for original reporting.